The Garden

Once upon a time, there was a girl who lived a townhouse with a small patch of dirt in the front and a little bit of porch space. When she first moved into this place, she placed a cute little gnome named Floyd in the patch of dirt to decorate the 'garden'. That night, Floyd disappeared and the girl was very sad :(

But this did not deter the girl and she adopted another gnome, Olaf, and placed him on her front patio out of sight from people on the sidewalk:

All was well in Gardenland when one day, a baby deer statuette appeared in the garden where Floyd had once been. How did this happen? and Where did the deer come from? The girl enjoyed the deer and left it in the garden for everybody to enjoy. But one day, a month later, the deer statuette also disappeared. The girl was once again sad :(

She adopted another tiny gnome named Steve and placed him next to her banana plant on the second floor patio:

And one day at the zoo, the girl saw a cute little pink flamingo and she adopted it to keep Steve company:
But the girl never forgot about little Floyd, her first gnome. Until one day, her sister-in-law sent her a huge surprise! Floyd (facsmilie) came home! This time, the girl put Floyd next to Steve so the two could frolick in the dirt together:

And everybody was happy in the little garden. The girl was happy, the flamingo was happy, the gnomes were happy, and the garden was happy :)

The End.

The UAW to represent PhD scientists?

I got an e-mail yesterday notifying me that the United Auto Workers Union (UAW) has petitioned to represent all post-doctoral researchers in the University of California system. Apparently there are a little over 5,000 UC post-docs and they claim to have gotten over 50% of our signatures on the petition. By having signatures from over 50% of the people, the UAW automatically represents all post-docs if California's public employment relations board (PERB) determines that the signatures are valid.

The UAW tried to unionize us 2 years ago (2006). We were told that the movement was not started by a post-doc, but by someone from the UAW who had been involved in unionizing graduate students at the University of Washington and University of California. At the time, UC post-docs started a multi-campus letter-writing campaign to dispute the UAW's claims towards unionization (Science article describing the backlash). In the end, the petition was thrown out because many of the signatures the UAW submitted were not valid. Some signatures were not from actual post-docs, and some signatures were from post-docs who rescinded their names from the petition. Basically, their methods of gaining signatures were 'shady' and people didn't like it.

Because it failed 2 years ago, I was surprised to see this issue come up again. Once again, I am VERY skeptical that the UAW actually has signatures from over 50% of post-docs in the UC system. What really surprised me is how quietly it came up this time. I have seen no chain e-mails or anti-pro-uaw websites popping up. Are post-docs really for UAW representation this time?

If you ask the post-docs that I know, the answer is NO! We are NOT for UAW representation of post-docs. But somebody out there must be if they got signatures from over 2,500 people (or maybe they didn't?).

I am not against unions. I am just against a union in this case. First of all, all UC post-docs get basic benefits like health insurance and access to a retirement plan. Also, the UC provides resources to help with safety and job issues. Plus, post-docs tend to be intelligent and highly motivated people who have chosen their positions and have other options if they do not like their jobs. We are a far cry from starving factory workers with no other prospects in life.

Yes, lots of professors treat their post-docs badly and make their lives miserable. But I highly doubt the UAW could make any difference in these cases-- they aren't going to negotiate giving a person credit on a paper when they do the work, or making sure someone gets a good recommendation when they deserve it. The UAW isn't going to make an asshole PI less of a jerk.

Also, some post-docs earn their higher salaries by bringing in grant money and their own fellowships. This money comes from the government and non-profit foundations. By forcing these people to unionize and take potentially lower salaries, they are being penalized for success. Also, all taxpayers and charitable donors are being penalized too. Some of the money they had assumed would be going towards medical research, cleaning the environment, or building better business models would directly line the pockets of UAW fat-cats instead.

The UAW takes over 1% of our salaries if they represent us. Assuming there are 5,000 post-docs who make $40,000/year on average, this means the UAW gets $2 million/year. It is obvious why they want to represent us. The question is, why in the world should WE want THEM?

Update: Post-docs are now part of the union.